Student Exchange Programs

Okay, i’ll try not to drag on.. but i needed to hear from other people’s perspective away from my friends since they are my friends and they will be on my side.

So, i had this friend, lets call her R. We were friends for few years.
She’s almost opposite as me, she’s anti social (she knows and comments on it all the time), she doesn’t like to be active etc….
But I still really liked her because she is very honest and at times maybe too honest. you know friends who just speak what ever is in their minds and sometimes it’s rude?? kinda like that.
but i liked that about her…

Anyways, last year i was in Rome for study abroad, and R was in Germany for exchange student as well, and we had a little argument on skype.
Something very small, stupid. childish. YES.
The fight was about how she thinks i’m controlling friend and i just stood up to her for the first time and told her how i felt about her. (I never spoke up to her before)

But we got over it and apologized. and i thought everything was better.
so few days later i just asked her how she was doing and she suddenly messages me saying,

“Please don’t talk to me, i got really sick after arguing with you. i don’t want to see you or talk to you for awhile”

OFCOURSE i got mad because i didn’t understand. WHO would be happy after hearing this from a friend? so i replied “i don’t understand but if that’s what you want, i don’t want to kill anybody”
She was blamming everything on me! she said she can’t get a summer internship because I MADE HER SICK. anyways, i didn’t reply after that because i just didn’t know what to say!

And days went on, summer break came and i heard from another friend she had depression in Germany. And i felt bad, and we had to see each other again after the summer break!
so i e-mailed her very long saying i’m sorry and that i didn’t mean any of what ever she is mad about.

she didn’t reply me back.

School came, she acted all normal, smiled and said hi.
I gave her a birthday present and genuinely told her happy b-day.

But till now i hear from all these people she talks behind my back.
I KNOW she still doesn’t like me.
So, i don’t really approach her. i say hi, but i never try to make a convo or anything!!!

YET! YET she still loathes me to death! she updates her status about me, She talks bad about me to people That doesn’t even know me….
she EVEN talks bad about me to my best friends!
but i don’t even see her that much! There is NOTHING to annoy her except from last summer when i told the truth of how I felt sometimes toward her….. I swear , I promise…That’s all..

I don’t really care much about her, because i have my own group of friends i see every day.
but we are in the same department and we have to see each other all the time. And even though i keep my distance, she STILL hates me and loathes me.

I don’t know what she wants from me….I just hate this feeling of being hated.
I don’t know what to do.
Talking to her is NOT an option because i know…from being her friend for this long that she won’t listen or accept any apologies once you are on her HATE list.

my friends tell me ignore her, and probably that’s the only solution but it’s hard.
i’ve never been so hated by somebody without knowing why.

If she really really didn’t care about me then she wouldn’t even bother hating me, but she’s still bothered by me so obviously i’m a big part of her life.